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I have every learning disability imaginable. ADHD? Check. Dyslexia? Check. Dyscalculia? Check (and I bet you googled it). For the first 20 years of my life, I considered these “disabilities” to be anchors that kept me from success.
I absorbed everything. I was a legitimate loser, but not the kind you think of in a modern definition. I literally LOST in everything. Sports, social opportunities, tests, really anything. Graduation dates? What is this? Sounds good. Getting a driver's license at 16? No. I chose to get a Nintendo instead.
I was convinced that mine inability to focus for one thing he would never let me dominate.
I was a straight C student from fifth grade until I graduated college. At least I was consistent. I got used to it, which gave me reason to call self-indulgence my best friend as a child. Well, smugness and Upper Deck baseball cards (when can I retire my Ken Griffey Jr. rookie card collection?!).
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Then, one day, I had an epiphany that changed the trajectory of my entire life. I realized that a crowded mind that never turns off is a super power as long as you use it right…and walk away Fair place there for at least one more thought.
I'll never forget my parents realizing there was something “different” about me, especially when it was time for me to sit down and “focus.”
It was 1986 and I was a young 6-year-old with no access to a cell phone or the Internet. I know what you're thinking: no six-year-old should have a cell phone or the Internet. It's really because we were still about two decades away from cell phones and the Internet.
My parents took me to be “tested” by a new kind of doctor, having noticed patterns with me that seemed disturbing.
“Rogers, you have ADHD.”
Huh? What the hell is this?
“It means you're prone to losing focus, especially with things you don't care about.”
Well, duh.
Maybe my parents should have uprooted our family from South Texas and moved us to Hollywood so I could shift my focus to being a child actor. But we stayed in Corpus Christi and my 20-year battle against the demon of distraction began.
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From group projects to pop quizzes, church ZERO personal expectations to excel. No one would have ever bet on me. The goal was simple PASS, at best. I remember the first time I had to do a book report – it was a disaster. I was nine years old and I took the book home (it was called “And Now, Miguel”) and copied the book verbatim and after about 17 hours of “work”, I gave a Moby Dick-esque package to my teacher (her name was Mrs. Cheshir), and she gave me the most confused look imaginable.
“Oh, a book report would say that I actually read the book and then share my thoughts on it? I missed that part.”
The journey was difficult. Along the way, I decided to add another tool to my belt. I called him dyslexia, and she was very mean to me – almost like a bully who never left me. Reading was already really hard, and now…it's like trying to play Tetris with letters? Fun. And let's go ahead and add the inability to do complex math questions remotely.
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My evenings after school were not like my friends. It wasn't even my weekends. It wasn't even my summers. Tutors, summer schools, and “creative” ways of learning have always been difficult, and I never saw a glimmer of light at the tunnel.
When I say I'm barely out of high school, I mean it. My friends were EXPECTED to win at everything. Sports, meetings, grades, awards, and college acceptance letters. I never thought I wanted to be 'something', as I was used to being the funny guy who was always making jokes in class.
High school graduation came around, and in a typical American moment, our high school newspaper came out a few weeks before graduation with the coveted Senior Superlatives list (aka the “Most Likely to…” list).
To my surprise, my name was there several times!
- Most likely to live at home after college
- The largest child in an adult body
- More fun to have class (at this point, this was the biggest achievement of my life)
- He will most likely return as a substitute teacher
- The biggest complainer
Okay, I know what you're thinking. I read it, got upset, and said to myself, “Man, it's time you actually did something with your life. Stop living the life everyone expects you to, and get out there and set the world on fire.”
To my surprise, you are right!
The day after the dreaded “awards” edition of the newspaper came out, I was playing basketball with a group of older boys (my friends have always been older). I was really embarrassed about the paper and told one of them something like, “I know I won't get good grades in college, I have zero hidden talents, and if I ever have to make a resume, I will win There will be nothing there to give people a reason to give me the time of day.”
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And then, out of nowhere, a guy came up to me, took his hand off my (sweaty) shoulders, and said something that changed my life forever.
“Rogers, the first thing you sell is yourself, not your resume.”
I was blown away. Does that mean my impressively pathetic grades, lack of organized activities, zero achievements and 10,000+ hours of James Bond on the N64 don't matter?
Well, they mattered, but what really mattered was that I would be able to use ME. My personality. My interests. My heart. My seller. My gut instincts.
From that moment on, I learned how to rely on myself. I learned that my obstacles could be treated as opportunities. Asking for help was a gift and pouring time into the things I cared about would give me the opportunity to have something I never had before.
Confidence.
Fast forward another 20 years, and I'm still working to become the best version of myself. This is with my faith, my family and my career. I could give you a list a mile long of things I like, but my favorite use of time is to highlight the one thing I know best.
Being myself.