After Jessica Holton, co-founder and CEO of Ours, had been dating her partner (now husband) for five years, she brought up the topic of going to couples therapy. There was nothing particularly wrong with the relationship – in fact it was the opposite. She realized they were in it for the long haul and sought counseling to deepen their relationship and avoid the mistakes she had seen in other relationships.

“I said, let's invest in our relationship. He was completely desperate,” Holton told me in a recent A day with Jon Bier podcast episode.

However, the process of finding the right therapist proved to be a daunting task: figuring out schedules, finding the right therapist, and realizing how stigmatized couples therapy was among family and friends.

“It was very shocking to me because I had been on this journey of embracing individual therapy and exercise and yoga and learning all the things that make us healthy, but when it comes to our relationship, the number one predictor of how we age physically . , emotionally and mentally, it was so stigmatized,” she says.

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Bridging the gap with technology

Holton's adviser's conundrum led him to create Ours, a relationship wellness company that connects couples with specialist therapists who are hand-vetted and hand-picked by our team. The idea is to make the process of finding the most suitable relationship expert more accessible and efficient, breaking down the barriers that stop many couples from seeking support.

“Our care team matches couples based on their intake surveys, what they're looking for directly with the therapist best suited for them,” explains Holton.

Ours also gives couples extracurricular exercises, such as Rose Bud Thorn rituals, that help couples maintain and strengthen the health of their relationships between scheduled sessions.

Proactive relationship health

Holton says one of Our main goals is to change the narrative around couples therapy. Rather than something you look for when your relationship is in trouble, Jona aims to normalize the idea of ​​”proactive relationship health.”

“Because, at the end of the day, I think relationships are meant to be enjoyed,” Holton says. “Putting work into our relationships shouldn't be stigmatized and should be fun.”

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How healthy relationships affect our health

The benefits of investing in a healthy relationship extend far beyond the couple themselves. Holton points out that when individuals feel more connected to their partners, it creates a foundation that supports every other aspect of their lives.

“When I'm solid with my partner, then I know I can take risks or explore deeper in my career,” she says.

Difficult conversations about money and children can be a little easier when a grounded feeling permeates all areas of life.

A healthy romantic relationship can extend to other significant relationships, such as those with family members, friends, and colleagues.

In couples therapy, “we're both learning about the other person and ourselves,” Holton explains. “So that's going to translate to how I present myself to my mom, my best friend from college, my sister, my co-founder.”

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How long does it take?

One question many people ask when they go to couples therapy for the first time is how long it will take. As a business model, this is also a consideration.

Holton says Jona is built to focus on the goal, whether that's improving communication skills, moving in together or getting married.

“So a couple will often work with a therapist in a fairly intensive way, either proactively or reactively,” she says. “It was a choice to make Ours offers extremely flexible, so couples can do once a month, twice a month, three times a month, four times a month, or even every week depending on where are and what they need.”

Once the couple gets past the major issues, they may go into maintenance mode, seeing their therapist less often.

“But you're still reinforcing the lessons, you're still exploring and investing in your relationship, but with a much lighter touch,” says Holton.

A 'sacred responsibility'

For Holton, helping people build better relationships is more than a job—it's a “sacred responsibility.” She hopes to make a difference by providing a platform that facilitates the growth of relationships.

“I can't imagine a more direct way to make the world a better place than by helping people be kinder to their partners, understand their partner, understand themselves, and generally have relationships stronger and healthier.”