“The Titanic was sinking, so we jumped into the lifeboat and rowed like hell.”
so New York Times Bestselling author Mary Kay Andrews describes the origins of Friends & Fictionweekly web series she co-hosts with her best-selling author friends Kristin Harmel, Kristy Woodson Harvey and Patti Callahan Henry. Every Wednesday night at 7pm ET, they chat with authors like Jodi Picoult, Kwame Alexander and Elin Hilderbrand about their latest works, their advice to writers, and the books they've read that have shaped their careers.
In 2020, four friends suddenly had their upcoming book tours canceled due to the pandemic. They hopped on a Zoom happy hour to chow down on glasses of rosé and began strategizing how to best reach their readers and support independent bookstores while everyone was stuck at home. As the summer flowed, so did the ideas, eventually manifesting in their wild popularity Show friends and fiction on YouTube AND podcastas well as one Facebook community which has more than 240,000 members.
Related: How to write a book (and actually finish it) in 5 steps
Since its inception, featuring former host Mary Alice Monroe, the show has branched out with live appearances, an online book club, a thriving thrift store, and newspapers in the F&F mix. “We thought we were doing this for ourselves and for bookstores, but the community was sitting there waiting,” says Patti Callahan Henry. “I'd like to say we had a plan for all of this, but we basically built a rocket ship on the way to the moon.”
Entrepreneur caught up with four of the show's founders to get their best advice for writers and creators hoping to make an impact. (Sadly, no rosé was consumed during the conversation.) While they each have their own unique approach to their craft, two words sum up their advice: just get started!
Overcoming the fear of failure
Patti Callahan Henry: MeIt's scary to say you want to write a book and then fail to get it published, but my advice is to jump right in. No one has grades to give you, but find the community, take lessons, and just start writing. What is the phrase? Jump and the net will appear.
Kristin Harmel: When you're trying something new or scary, the first thing you need to do is make an investment in yourself. You have to believe that you can do it and that all the time and effort you put into it will be worth it. Every great work that has ever been created began in the mind of one person.
Kristy Woodson Harvey: You cannot be controlled by that fragile baby ego that we all have. The reality is that being a writer usually doesn't look pretty at first. We've all had those book reading events where one person shows up or no one comes at all. And that part of your ego says, “I can't fail. I can't let other people see me fail.” But here's the reality: people really only care about themselves. I hate to say it this way, but my failure does not mean that too much for someone else. You just have to move on and move on.
Self-publishing vs. traditional publishing
Mary Kay Andrews: I think it all depends on your goals. If you have a story you're ready to tell and just need to get it out there, then that's your priority and self-publishing might make more sense. Traditional publishing, which is the path we've all gone down, takes longer. It is more painful. You face rejection at every turn. I think people need to be really educated about not only the craft, but the business of writing. Learn what publishers are looking for. If your story is unique and off the wheel of a typical traditional publisher, then self-publishing may be the best and only way to get out.
Kristin Harmel: To get published traditionally, you almost certainly need to get an agent. I have no regrets about having an agent and it has been an incredible working partnership. But I think in terms of the changing landscape of publishing, more and more people are able to get read and achieve this dream of having a published novel. I think it's great that there are so many more opportunities than there were when we all started.
Patti Callahan Henry: I try to advise people to be patient. It took me years after I finished my first novel to get published—get an agent, rewrite it, start another. My first book was not actually published. But you have this urgency because you've put in all this work and you can make decisions based on impatience. So educate yourself in this process. hear Friends & Fictiongo to classes, go to groups, go to conferences, participate in competitions. Once you get that process and business knowledge, you can determine the best path for you.
Related: Self-Publishing or Traditional Publishing: Which is Best for You?
The need to be ruthless
Kristy Woodson Harvey: I used to work in finance and I approached the publication as if I were approaching a client who had a lot of money but was a hot mess with their finances. I researched all the agents I wanted to feature and also read the publishing stories of every author I admired. How did they do it? Then I made this big chart of all the ways people had published. I hated the idea of just saying, “Well, I'm going to submit to these agents and if they all say no, then that's it.” I had my plan A, plan B, plan C, and plan D. I actually signed with a literary agent, but at the same time, I was submitting to several writing contests. And I ended up getting my first book deal because of a writing contest. So I tell people to never think “Well that didn't work so I'm dead in the water”. It's more like, “If this doesn't work, what's next? And what's next after that?”
Mary Kay Andrews: When I was trying to get published, I worked full-time as a newspaper reporter at that Atlanta Journal-Constitution. I was really unhappy with my career. The managing editor told me I wasn't a writer and would never be one. That brutal statement was burned into my brain. And I was like Scarlett O'Hara, “As God is my witness, I will prove you wrong!” And I developed this thing that a friend told me about called Scam a Day. This means that every day you take one subversive small step towards achieving your goal. So Scam a Days I could assign myself to interview authors coming from Atlanta on book tours or looking for an agent while I was at work. This is against the rules, but you can put it on the record. As everyone knows, I have nothing left to give.
Related: As a self-published author she sold 500,000 copies of her book
Writing process hacks
Mary Kay Andrews: I draft by hand in one of those old black and white dot composition books. I start jotting down thoughts, ideas, and scene questions—my agent always calls this the “I'm talking to myself” part of the process. After I've talked to myself enough, then all of a sudden I start writing scenes and I start writing dialogue. And I try to understand at least 500 words. On a really good day, I'll write 2,000 words by hand, then jump on my laptop and type them into a document, revising as I go.
Kristin Harmel: I'm a big believer in outlining. I am a conspirator. The opposite of being a conspirator is being a pantser, where you fly by the seat of your pants. And I wish I could be a pantser, it seems like it would be a lot more fun. But if you are new to this, I would suggest starting as a plotter because it gives you a guide. It gives you a security blanket and most importantly, it's a defense against writer's block, because if you know the basic path down to the bottom, you'll never get stuck.
Kristy Woodson Harvey: I'm probably the loosest of our group. I wrote my first book mostly when I was ready to breastfeed. There was no time then where I could say, “Oh, I'm going to sit down and write 2,000 words.” I would just use every moment I had and write whatever part of the story burned into my brain – dialogue between two characters, a scene, whatever it was. And when I was done, I had three quarters of a story. And then I did something very professional that I nicknamed Writing Through Story. I filled in the missing pieces between all those pieces. And that's been my process ever since.
Patti Callahan Henry: When I first started writing, my children were five, three and a newborn. So I made a habit of writing from 4:30 to 6:30 in the morning. I don't write at 4:30 now, but I write in the morning. I keep my morning hours sacred. I am very devoted to them. There are many different approaches, but the important thing is that you have to find the way the story comes to you and then be disciplined about it. I don't think you can force yourself to be a different kind of writer than you are, but I do think you have to commit to the kind of writer you are.