You're reading body language wrong. Decipher non-verbal signals by following these 5 steps.


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Most people think of reading body language it's as simple as watching a smile, a wink, or a raised eyebrow. They know, from experience, that observing a gesture or movement can help them immensely to gauge the intent of DECISION across the boardroom table from them. That's what we're used to, right?

In fact, it is wrong.

Imagine a vital investor or partner meeting. At the head of the table stands Mrs. Johnson, a potential partner whose alliance can lift your company to new heights. As you propose, she briefly touches her necklace. A sign of doubt, you suppose. However, her posture remains straight, her gaze fixed and her lips pressed in contemplation – all these indicate that she is very determined and has a strong opinion.

This mosaic of gestures—the touch of the necklace, the fixed eyes, the determined posture—is the core of the groupings in body language. Focusing on a single gesture may have caused an error in your interpretation and thus your presentation or negotiation strategy. However, understanding the collective message of these signals provides invaluable insight into Ms. Johnson's mindset. Body language “groups” are indispensable in business communication.

Individual gestures – when taken out of context – can be deceiving. However, when multiple nonverbal gestures come together at once or within a short period of time (and the time frame in which they appear makes all the difference), they reveal a more comprehensive story about a person's inner dialogue, decision-making process, or feeling.

For an entrepreneur looking to grow their business, this nuanced understanding can be the difference between sealing a partnership and walking away from a lost opportunity.

Let's explore ways to read body language in groups to more accurately understand what someone is thinking or feeling. These insights are derived from my multi-faceted career of over 35 years spent in thousands of hours meeting, observing topics and presenting.

Connected: An expert negotiator shares the 4 body language signs every entrepreneur should know

1. Holistic observation

Instead of narrowing your focus to a single gesture, try to understand the person's overall behavior. If a colleague looks away but maintains an open attitude, their distraction may be external rather than a reflection on the discussion. It's your job to look beyond the single gesture and see what else is going on with that person (or group of people). Is the gesture isolated? It is rare. But this clue may be more visible, so your attention is focused there. You need to be more holistic in your observation and try to detect whatever other signals are being sent to you.

2. The context of the situation

A clenched fist in a relaxed environment is very different from the same gesture in a heated boardroom discussion – one can show anger. Conversely, another may show impatience or a desire to intervene. Always calibrate your reading to the environment and recognize any other circumstances that trigger the behavior. The gesture is not isolated from other gestures, but it is also not isolated from the environment and the conversation that takes place. Be sure to calibrate all of these elements as you determine the meaning of the data.

3. Set a base

Know people common behaviors. The gestures of a naturally animated person may not carry the same weight as those of a reserved individual. Try to spot deviations from their norm (as best you can if you've just met someone), as the most critical messages often lie there. You can do this at the beginning of a meeting during the “chatchat” phase. Try to force yourself to notice someone's behavior when the topic is something other than the topic of the meeting. This is what will give you insight into their basic behavior and behavior.

4. Distinguish between emotion and cognition

Body language patterns can illuminate both feelings and thoughts. Crossed arms with eyebrows can portray physical discomfort. However, the same crossed arms with a nod can signal agreement despite possible reservations. It is your job to observe the person (or people) and then try to find out if the signal they are sending is an emotional reaction to something that has just been said or if it results from a thought that has been triggered. Knowing which one directs body language cues will help you decide how to direct your presentation to your advantage. The only way to find out is to start quietly asking yourself, “are they reacting emotionally or logically?” while in meetings. of conscious awareness it will only help you get better and better at understanding it.

Connected: Body language is powerful – Make any of these 4 mistakes and you're silently sabotaging your interactions

5. Engage in intentional observation

Dedicate time to your interactions just to observe. At your next important meeting, set aside a few brief moments to study the collections of nonverbal cues. This deliberate practice will help you improve your skills, ensuring that it becomes second nature when it matters most. You can even practice this every day – at the coffee shop or grocery store. Observation is a skill that only improves when you give it the care it needs and deserves.

For the experienced entrepreneur, nonverbal communication it's packed with insights that can change the way you approach negotiations and presentations. Body language clusters are one of the high-level tools that transform quick observations into a deeper understanding of human behavior and decision-making.

As you prepare for key meetings and business interactions, remember that while a single gesture can provide a glimpse into someone's mind, groups reveal the full narrative. It is within these patterns that the true essence of communication and successful outcomes lies. Consider and practice the concepts above to equip yourself with the necessary first steps to spot clusters, and then let every interaction be a testament to the skill you're developing.



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